Ultraman Leg Episode 5
Once upon a time, a little boy lived in a crystalline manor awash with the smell of cinnamon and dusty ancient books. His father was held in high regard as the galaxy’s most skillful pâtissier, aliens from all over the universe pilgrimaging to the Land of Light for a chance to taste his legendary cookies. His mother was an esteemed professor of history, constantly hard at work piecing together the snippets of the times long past. Though enticed by the magic of dad’s cooking, the little boy was much more drawn towards mom’s ancient texts. Whatever time not allocated to establishing his reputation as a virtuoso of pranking (or, as his neighbors preferred to call him, “intolerable demon child”) was spent with his figurative nose in the books. At first the records of bloody battles and horrific crimes of days long past amused him. But as the boy matured, he slowly came to realize that such things were not simply relics of the ancient times. The Space Garrison’s efforts have indeed brought peace to many a galaxy. However, the universe was vast, and Ultras, no matter how powerful, still had limits. No matter how hard they tried, somewhere in the far reaches of space villainy and injustice would still prosper, and even though millions of innocent lives would be saved by Ultra Warriors on a daily basis, some of these precious lives would inevitably slip through their fingers. The universe was a pretty dark and cruel place, and though the heroic actions of the Space Garrison made a world of difference, the rate of progress was painfully slow. The little Ultra, passionate by nature, was overcome with a burning rage over this injustice. And so a fiery dream blossomed within this child’s soul. “Become a hero” “Become a hero and protect those who are unable to protect themselves” “Become a hero and make the world a better place!” The lives that slipped through the fingers of the other Ultra Heroes...He would be the one to reach out his hands and catch them! The boy was all too familiar with what it took to be a hero. His uncle and great uncle were both elite warriors of the Space Garrison. Though being a civilian meant he hardly ever had a chance to meet them face to face, just watching video recordings of them in action was enough for him to grow to idolize them. They were like a majestic hurricane of justice, sweeping away any evildoer that dared to stand in their path. So at the age of 3000, after having his Color Timer implanted into his body (oh, how he nagged his parents for the flashy heart-shaped one!) he joined the Space Garrison training academy without a second thought. He was so excited he was unable to sleep for the entire week leading up to the enrollment ceremony! “So, kids!” Instructor Taro announced to the crowd of overexcited new trainees, “Why did you sign up for Space Garrison training? What are your hopes and dreams?” “I WANNA STRIKE DOWN EVIL AND MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE!!!” the boy shrieked as loudly as his vocal cords would let him, drowning out the voices of his new classmates. “Woah there, young one!” Instructor Taro chuckled, “You’re far from being the only one who has such a dream, but you certainly seem to be the most passionate one! Well then, let’s see how far that passion is gonna take you!” The triple-sluggered child vibrated with excitement so hard he lost his balance and fell over. At last! His journey towards becoming a hero was finally beginning! …Or was it? It was during basic training at the Space Garrison training academy that he experienced first-hand just how cruel and unfair the universe could be. Ever since day one he had always struggled greatly on even the most basic assignments. Though his mind was sharp and his heart of justice burned with the intensity of a supernova, none of these things could make up for his devastating lack of talent in all things physical. Small and thin as a rake since birth, he would always be the first one to get worn out. His aim and coordination were so abysmal that his beams would not only miss the target, but rake up thousands in collateral damage. In sparring matches, he was little more than a punching bag. Even his sole natural gift, his triple Eye Sluggers, would veer off course with every attempt to control them. Still, he tried his best not to be discouraged. Baby steps or not, he was still making progress towards his dream. He would never, ever give up. His uncle and great uncle had both faced immeasurable adversity. A video collection narrating their most hard-fought battles was stashed away neatly in his room. Horrific injuries, soul-crushing grief – they relentlessly plowed through all of it with nothing but sheer grit and determination. As long as they still had enough functioning bodyparts to drag themselves forward, they would keep on fighting. That was super-cool to the point of bringing tears to his eyes, and he wanted to be just like them! The daily grind dragged on and on for years, centuries, millenia, and the gap in skills between him and his classmates seemed to get wider and wider and wider. It was only a matter of time before thoughts of his own inferiority started to creep into the young Ultra's mind. Still, he refused to let his determination fade. He stubbornly believed that as long as he kept on doing his very best, he would definitely achieve his dream and become a hero capable of making the world a better place. ————————————————————————————————————————— “Lumiere you stupid loser!” a classmate of his, a brawny blue Ultra with an hourglass-shaped Color Timer, roughly slammed the triple-sluggered youth against a wall, “Because of you our team lost the battle simulation! Now I, as the team’s captain, have to take responsibility for your lame-ass performance and scrub all the floors in the training facility!” “Give it to ‘im, Geron!” cheered another classmate, “Serves ‘im right!” “I’m sorry guys….I’m really sorry…” Lumiere whimpered at the pain of Geron’s bruising grip, “I did everything I could!” “Well obviously your best wasn’t good enough!” Geron scowled, “It never is!” “I’m sorry! How can I make this up to you guys? I’ll scrub these floors for you if you want!” “The only way you can make it up to us,” the grip on Lumiere’s shoulders tightened, “Is by dropping out of the academy!” “Wait!” Lumiere cried out in desperation, “Guys, I’m getting better! I understand that I’m a burden for all of you right now, but I swear I will eventually catch up! Just please, give me a chance!” “Face reality, moron!” Geron slapped him across the face, “Wake up! If they allow hopeless losers like you to graduate out of sympathy, it will be a disaster! Because of the gap between us you’re always going to be dragging us down during missions!” “I won’t! I swear!” “Shut the hell up!” Geron’s fist dug into Lumiere’s solar plexus, winding the red Ultra, “MY DAD DIED IN BATTLE BECAUSE HE CONSTANTLY HAD TO PICK UP THE SLACK FOR HIS WEAKEST TEAMMATE!!! WHENEVER THEY LET WEAKLINGS INTO THE SPACE GARRISON, MORE INNOCENT LIVES ARE LOST!” Lumiere coughed and wheezed, failing to pry Geron’s arms away from his body. “I will…Never…Give…Up…On…My… Dream…” he croaked out, “I will…be a useful hero…I will…Make…The world…A…Better…Place…” “Oh, shut the hell up! You always keep prattling on and on about your stupid little dream, as if it’s gonna make life go easy on you! How delusional of you! Honestly, the world will be a much better place without your weakness dragging us down! The best thing you can do for the world is drop out!” Lumiere fell to his knees as he was harshly released. “Get out of my sight!” Geron spat, “If I ever see you again in our school I’m really gonna pound ya!” Biting his trembling bottom lip, the red Ultra slowly dragged himself to his feet. “Just you wait…” he wheezed, “I…I never give up…I will be a useful hero…I will…I will make the world a better place…” As Geron and the other trainee watched him stagger away, they burst into mocking laughter. “Look at that proud, dignified gait!” Geron howled, “How fitting for a great hero!” On that day, Lumiere stayed out far longer than usual. As night fell, he crawled through the doors of his home like a dying animal. Ignoring his worried parents, he locked himself in his room. There, he let himself weep until his tears ran dry. But he did not allow himself even the slightest thought of giving up. ————————————————————————————————————————— In the Land of Light’s brilliant sky, a battle raged on. Once again, some space bandit from Planet Magma had managed to invade the Land of Light, intent on helping himself to the Ultra Bell Tower’s treasury. By now, such petty invasions were almost a daily occurrence. And the perpetrators were apprehended just as easily as they popped up. But this time something was very, very wrong. How was it possible that the mighty Ultraman Zero himself was struggling so greatly against this seemingly ordinary space thug?! “NYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!” roared the invader, the metallic studs on his suit of leather armor – way too revealing to function as anything other than a fashion accessory - clanging in rhythm with his guffawing, “Can’t hurt me, can ya?!” Zero yelled profanities so vile the parents in the crowd of spectators were forced to cover their children’s ears as he violently sliced at the alien with his Zero Twin Sword. “Ow ow ow ow ow ow!” yowled the Magma, not making even the slightest attempt to dodge or block even as Zero’s attacks shore chunks of flesh and bone from his torso. For wherever his body was sliced, the wounds would heal in a matter of seconds, severed muscle and nerve fibers knitting together, sections of bone folding out of severed stumps like the segments of a telescope, smooth new skin stretching over what just a moment ago used to be a mortal wound. As the barrage of attacks came to an end, the only effect it seemed to have on the bandit was slight annoyance. “You’re no ordinary Magma!” Zero growled, “What the hell are you, dammit!?” “Me?” The Magma’s grin stretched so wide the flesh of his lips momentarily split open in ugly gashes, only to be immediately restored by his healing factor. “Cut this horror movie bullsh*t! Yes, you!” “An immortal...And dare I say it…''A god''…” the Magma purred silkily, his forked tongue slithering over the blade of the Zero Twin Sword, “Give up before it’s too late, little Ultra! In case you haven’t noticed, we’ve been at this for hours now, and compared to my eternal state of being fresh as a daisy your attacks are beginning to get pretty slow and sloppy! My immortality has ensured my victory before this battle had even begun! NYAAAAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!” Zero’s response was to scream “GO CHOKE ON AN ENTIRE DICK!!!!!!” at the top of his lungs and decapitate the Magma with one clean slash. The spectators exploded into applause. “Yikes.” The immortal sighed as his severed head flew through the air. “ ”YIKES” THIS!!!” Zero yelled, grabbing the head by its mane of hair and holding it out in front of his chest. The Zero Twin Sword split into two Zero Sluggers and attached to the Ultra’s Color Timer, crackling with charge as the energy for a point-blank Zero Twin Shoot built up. “Pfffffft!” the severed Magma head snorted, a whole new body popping out of its neck stump with a stomach-turning squelch. “Oh shi~” was all Zero had enough time to say before the freshly-regenerated Magma body materialized a saber in place of its right hand and drove it straight through his torso. “Too. Slow.” The Magma purred as the Ultra gasped and twitched in pain-induced shock, lightblood-stained hands scrambling limply at the blade as it was slowly withdrawn from the gaping hole in his side. Several stuttering sparks burst out of his dimming Beam Lamp - was it a primal defense reflex of a dying brain, or perhaps a pathetic attempt at an Emerium Slash? “Oh?” the immortal bandit raised a brow ridge, “We still have a little fight left in us, don’t we? Just what the hell is it with you Ultras? Why do you always try to draw out your suffering? Silly, silly creatures! Nyahahahahahah! Well…If a bit more pain is really what you wish for, I shall gladly grant that wish!” Howling with triumphant laughter as he ascended higher and higher into the sky, the Magma hoisted the incapacitated Ultra above his head and threw him downwards with all his immortal might. Many of the onlookers leapt forth to at the very least try to break his fall, but an energy beam burst from the Magma’s grinning mouth, mowing down the Ultras by the dozens. Confined by the walls of his impact crater, all Zero could do was claw at the dirt in helpless rage as the immortal scumbag wreaked havoc upon innocent lives. “NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!” the Magma shrieked, speeding downwards through the air, saber poised to deliver the finishing blow to his broken adversary. Zero tried his damnedest to get up and get back in there. He really did. But all he could muster was pushing his shattered body off the ground by a few lousy centimeters before his arms quite frankly lost the ability to arm and his heroic effort culminated in the most uncool of faceplants. Rolling over onto his back, Zero stared at the sky, stared his impending death in the face. Sh*t. Was he really done? Was it really gonna end like this? He was going to die. Not by the hand of Belial or any similar adversary. HE HAD JUST THROWN HIS LIFE AWAY PROTECTING TREASURES FROM SOME RANDOM SPACE BANDIT!!! DAMMIT!!!! The tip of the Magma’s saber, still glistening with his own lightblood, sped towards him. No longer restrained by power, terror flooded Zero’s heart. “Somebody, anybody! Please, save me!” A few inches away from piercing his Color Timer, the blade froze. Lightblood slowly seeped down its edge. As warm droplets of it pitter-pattered against his face, Zero could swear he could hear a voice whispering to him in his mind. Soft and timid, yet permeated by an unyielding resolve. “It’s okay. I’m here. I’ll protect you.” With a shocked gasp, Zero frantically rubbed at his face with a shaking hand, fighting back nausea as realization dawned on him. That desperate plea for help of his had been answered in the worst way possible. A small body writhed on the saber’s blade like a speared fish, hacking up spurts of lightblood in its agonized convulsions. Bathed in the light of the Plasma Spark, three Sluggers gleamed on top of its head. “Well well well…” The Magma regarded his new victim with surprised amusement, “A sacrifice to accompany a warrior to the next world? I never knew you Ultras practiced this kind of rituals!” “Ka…ka…ka…” Lumiere chuckled wheezily, “Got…ya…” “What’s so funny, kid?” the Magma sneered, “Getting a little loopy from the blood loss, are we?” “Ka…ka...Don’t ya think…” a leather headband, adorned by a gleaming green jewel, was clutched in the young Ultra’s shaking fist, “You’re missing something?” The noise the Magma made could only be described as a hideously malformed hybrid of yowling and yodeling. “MY…MY ASCLEPPER BANDANA!!!” he shrieked, “YOU LITTLE BASTARD!!! YOU PURPOSELY LET ME IMPALE YOU SO YOU COULD GET CLOSE ENOUGH TO SNATCH IT OFF MY HEAD!!!” “When Uncle Zero…lopped your head off…” Lumiere’s voice was a hoarse, fading whisper, but his grin stretched from ear to ear, “He was aiming…For your face…B-but you…You stuck out your neck instead! Why would you… an immortal that can regenerate anything… protect a specific bodypart? This made no sense…Unless…” he winked at his tormentor, “The source of your immortality was attached to your head!” “YOU OBSERVANT LITTLE SH*T!!!” “Ka…ka…ka…I’m no good at fighting...So…Analyzing my opponent’s every move is the best I can do!” “SHUT YOUR YAP!!! GIVE ME BACK MY ASCLEPPER!!!” the Magma squealed “Oh? You mean this shiny rock?” With the last of his power Lumiere’s Beam Lamp lit up, “Ultra Psychokinesis!" “WHA~…WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU HALF-DEAD RUNT!?” “SAY BYE-BYE TO YOUR IMMORTALITY, JERKFACE!!!” Lumiere yelled out on top of his half-collapsed lungs, telekinetically tossing the headband as far as he could. “NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!! “ the Magma shrieked in despair, violently flailing his saber arm around. Lumiere gagged up lightblood and screamed in agony as his grievous injury was further aggravated. “I’LL KILL YOU!!! I’LL ERASE EVERY SINGLE ATOM OF YOU FROM EXISTENCE! I AM IMMORTAL! I AM INVINCIBLE!!! I AM A GO…” The tiniest particles of the Asclepper’s healing energy still lingered in the Magma’s body. Far from enough to sustain his immortality, but just enough to prevent instant death. And for the three horrifying seconds those particles bought him, he was fully aware of his eyes staring into each other as his body slid apart into two neat lengthwise halves. As the evildoer’s bisected corpse finally exploded, behind him, having let the Zero Twin Sword clatter to the ground, Ultraman Zero stood, his body heaving with ragged breaths, clutching Lumiere’s limp, exsanguinated body to his chest. He still wasn’t sure how he managed to muster the strength to leap out of the crater for that final attack. On broken legs, to boot. “U-uncle…Zero…” Lumiere wheezed weakly, “You…Did it…So cool…” “Kiddo…Lumiere…” Zero hugged his nephew to his chest, “Cut the bullsh*t! You saved me! You’re the cool one!” “Uncle Zero…” the young Ultra whispered, the glow of his Beam Lamp dimming as more and more lightblood drained out of the gaping hole where his Color Timer used to be, “Did I…Do well?” “EH!? What the hell are you talking about?!” “Did I…make the world…a better…place…?” “Of course you did! Who knows how many innocent lives have been saved from that stupid god-wannabe! And it’s all thanks to you, Lumiere!” “I’m so…glad…” Lumiere mouthed, his head lolling back. “Hey…Lumiere…This is a bad joke buddy! Wake up! WAKE UP DAMMIT!!!” ————————————————————————————————————————— Taro paced back and forth nervously in the Silver Cross Hospital ICU waiting room. Behind the doors, commanding voices and mechanical beeps could be heard as the doctors fought for his student’s life. “Please try to calm down, my son,” he felt a familiar warm hand rest on his shoulder, “Being so stressed out can put your health in jeopardy too!” “Mother? How is he!?” The Mother of Ultra let out a heavy sigh. “We’ve managed to somewhat stabilize his condition, but we weren’t able to stop him from slipping into a coma…There’s no telling when he’ll wake up. His body was already severely weakened before sustaining these injuries. Taro, have you pushed him too hard in training?” “Oh no, absolutely not! The training of every student in the Space Garrison training academy follows a personalized plan that’s optimized for their body!” “That boy’s body is completely riddled with strains, sprains and stress fractures! Even the slightest movement must’ve been excruciating in that state!” “Oh no…” Taro clenched his fists, “Trainee Lumiere is the most driven and hardworking kid I’ve ever taught...In order to catch up to his classmates, he must’ve been subjecting himself to extra training on his own! To think he’d overdo it so much and end up so badly hurt because of it… Dammit, how could I not have foreseen that!? I should’ve stopped him!” “Don’t blame yourself,” the Mother of Ultra pulled her son into a warm hug, “For now, the only thing we can do is make sure he recovers.” “This kid is heartbreaking to look at...” Taro sighed, “It’s obvious that his body is just not built for fighting, yet he stubbornly continues to struggle on, staking his hopes and dreams on those microscopic bits of progress he’s managing to squeeze out of himself…To be honest, I should’ve advised him to drop out for the sake of his own safety. Many times I would steel myself, promising to myself that today would be the day I put an end to his futile struggle…But the look in those eyes of his…It burned through my very soul…And the words would refuse to leave my mouth…I realized that if I were to make him drop out, it would be as though I had taken this child’s life with my own two hands...” “hhHHHHeaAAaadbbbaaAANNNd” groaned a voice so slurred and hoarse it might as well have been coming from a grave. Both mother and son flinched in a mixture of startlement and sympathy pains. A Pigmon-patterned 3D printed cast covering everything but his head and arms, an IV drip stand and two entire terrified nurses in tow, Zero bodily dragged himself over the doorstep of the waiting room, having overheard everything. “Why am I not surprised?” the Mother of Ultra sighed, “Zero, please stop slithering around like a slug and let the nurses take you back to your room! Your father is worried about you!” “Bbuuut hHHeadbbnand!!!!!” Zero slurred in a painkiller-induced haze, “It can ssssave him” “Headband? What headband? What are you talking about?” Taro perked up “Thhat Magma guy’s hhhheadbbabnd…” Zero groaned, a string of drool hanging off his chin, “If it was heallning hm each time he got hhrutt…Ssoo I thought maybbe it ccan hhehaal him ttooo…Please…Find iiit…” Following the Magma’s defeat, his headband had been confiscated by the Space Garrison. The Ultras involved in its confiscation had indeed reported feeling surprisingly rejuvenated after coming into contact with the mysterious green crystal that adorned it. With their available options for treating Lumiere’s injuries exhausted and his condition deteriorating slowly yet steadily, the Silver Cross Corps ordered the confiscated artifact to be brought to the hospital after much careful consideration. And by the time Zero had finally been subdued and carted off into his room, Lumiere was sleeping soundly in his healing capsule with the headband on his forehead, bathed in the green crystal’s glow. The organ damage from the stab wound had all but evaporated without leaving the slightest scar, and so had the wear and tear on his body caused by the brutal training he would put himself through every day for years on end. And for the first time in centuries, Lumiere was smiling in his sleep, all his fears and worried soothed by the stone’s healing light. ————————————————————————————————————————— “It would appear that this is an Asclepper. To think that one of those would surface somewhere in this universe again, much less fall inTO the hands of such a despicable person!” Professor Hikari said, meticulously studying the crystal under a Plasma Spark-powered microscope. “An Asc-what?” asked a confused yet fairly healthy-looking Zero, fiddling with the empty headband. “A Panacea Diamond, also known as an Asclepper. There are only several of these crystals in existence, scattered across the multiverse. They share the same magnitude of healing ability, however, their sizes and times of operation vary. According to my calculations, this one has around a year and two months’ worth of charge. The leading theory right now is that it’s a piece of Magma tech, forged from a fragment of their planet’s core. I, however, have a theory of my own to counter it. You see, the crystalline structure of this stone is strangely reminiscent of the cytoskeleton of an eukaryotic ce…Zero? ZERO!!!” Rather than suffering through hours of Hikari’s technobabble, Zero had chosen to snatch the Asclepper from the microscope and fling himself out of the window. “EUREKA!!!” he whooped as he careened around buildings, suddenly stricken by a bright idea “I’M A F*CKING GENIUS!!!” ————————————————————————————————————————— “…umiere! Hey Lumiere! Wake up! You’ve been out for a whole month you doofus!” “Hhuh?” Lumiere stirred, pawing blindly at the source of the voice. A blurry Zero, sporting a fluorescent purple bandana decorated by the Asclepper in the middle, slowly came into focus. “H-huh…Uncle Zero? Why are you wearing that bad guy’s…? Wait, are you dead too?” Lumiere’s lower lip began to shake, tears pooling in his bleary eyes “I’m sorry Uncle Zero…I did my best to save you…I should’ve expected that my best wouldn’t be good enough…It never is…But to think that even my life wouldn't be good enough to save just one single person...That's cruel! That's just too unfair!” “Woah, woah, WOAH, dude!” Zero stammered. Crying kids with critically low self-esteem were definitely not his forte. “Don’t cry! We’re not dead! That Magma bastard’s shiny immortality rock healed all of our injuries!” Lumiere’s jaw almost hit him in his freshly-replaced Color Timer, his brain struggling to process the fact that he had succeeded at something for once. “Hey Lumiere!” Zero pulled the headband off his head, “Taro told me how badly you want to get really strong and become a great hero! So why don’t we make you one? Wanna go train with me?” “But I…” Lumiere whimpered, his head hanging low “I have no talent for fighting…No matter how hard I try to get stronger, I just end up hurting myself and being a burden to others! So lately I’ve been thinking…Maybe it just isn’t meant to be…Maybe it’s foolish for me to keep up this whole “never giving up” thing…Heh…Maybe giving up on your dreams is just a part of growing up...Maybe I’m better off staying in the kitchen like my dad or becoming a scholar like my mom…” “What if I told you that “never giving up” comes in many different forms?” Zero grinned, waving the Asclepper bandana in Lumiere’s face, “What you need to do is just pick a different way! And I have just the idea for that!” “H-huh?” Lumiere blinked in bewilderment. “The Asclepper. This shiny rock. It can heal any damage to your body. So I figured…Fatigue from training is also a kind of damage! If you strap this thing on, you’ll be able to train for an entire year without overexerting yourself and needing to stop! Just think of the progress you’ll be able to make!” Zero’s grin was so wide Lumiere was left wondering how his face had not split in half yet. “I even tried it on myself for the month you spent snoozing! It really does take away pain and fatigue, but not the actual feeling of it, so I kinda almost died despite the whole immortality thing, but “almost” doesn’t count. I’m sure you’ll be able to handle it!” “Are you…” Lumiere choked on a sob, messily smearing tears across his face” Uncle Zero…Are you saying that I’m n-not hopeless!?” “Of course not! Just put on this bandana and come with me! Me and my squad have so much to teach you! That’s right dude you’re gonna have FIVE ENTIRE MASTERS! How does that sound? Do you wanna go train with me?” Lumiere stared up at his uncle in mesmerized awe. “Of course.” he squeaked out, before curling up into a shivering ball, chanting “Uncle Zero thinks I’m not hopeless. Uncle Zero thinks I’m not hopeless. Uncle Zero thinks I’m not hopeless.” under his breath like a prayer. “Uh…Dude? Are you okay?” Lumiere fainted. ————————————————————————————————————————— What the hell had just happened? There’s no way this was real. Lightblood coated his knuckles, evaporating into brilliant sparkles that danced around him like fireflies. Uncle Zero’s lightblood. He was the one who had spilled it! A few steps away, Zero slowly regains his bearings. He stands up. Staggers. Leans heavily on a rock. And begins to laugh. “Uncle Zero…I’m so sorry…” Lumiere stammers, the world around him hazy and his heart pounding in his ears. Everything feels like it’s in slow motion. “It…It was an accident…” “That was no accident, kiddo…” Zero chuckles, luminescent drops rolling viscously down his chin, “You slugged me real good.” “But wait…” Lumiere’s world is swaying like a stormy sea, rock formations and craters undulating like pendula. His knees feel shaky and his body too heavy and too light at the same time. “This can’t be possible…Me…The weak, hopeless me…Fighting against you and actually inflicting damage…” “I thought I told you multiple times to stop calling yourself weak, dammit! You never were weak to begin with! Being strong is not just being able to beat up a lot of bad guys! That’s just the physical part! And now, in order to help you achieve your dream, we’ve made your physical power catch up to the strength of your heart! You’re awesome, Lumiere, so don’t ever forget that!” “I’m…Strong…” Lumiere mutters, staring in a stupor at his hands. It all feels like a dream. Just a year ago he would spend every day slowly succumbing to the feeling of his own helplessness. But now, the amazing Uncle Zero, the hero whom he had looked up to since he was a child, was standing before him, bearing the damage inflicted by his fists, and acknowledging his power. He was finally strong enough to follow his dream. Something snapped inside him. His legs went numb and gave out, and he collapsed to his hands and knees. There was no stopping the flood of tears that swept over him. He was drowning in a whirlpool of emotion, unable to do anything but bawl out loud as the raging waves tossed him around like a ragdoll. And with every tear he shed the heaviness in his chest he had carried within himself ever since his first day at the Space Garrison training academy would get a tiny bit lighter, several millenia’s worth of failure, frustration and self-doubt slowly yet steadily being washed away from his soul. He didn’t know how much time had passed since his breakdown, but when the tears finally stopped, he was frankly amazed at just how many of them could fit inside him. Holy crap, he had actually cried a big enough puddle to clearly see his own reflection. And now that he could see himself for the first time in a year, he was even more amazed by how different he looked. Though still somewhat lanky and wiry, his body had considerably increased in muscle mass and tone. He had grown slightly taller as well. But that was far from the most striking difference between the old and new him. It’s as if he carried himself like a completely new person. Though he wasn’t consciously aware of it, his body language was that of a person ready to take on the entire universe and win. Honestly speaking, it was kind of scary to look this intimidating. It had fully awakened inside him at last. The fighting spirit of his bloodline. ————————————————————————————————————————— “Eh? You want to WHAT?” Zero gaped at his student “That’s right Uncle Zero. I want to change my name. I feel like…The moment I’d landed that hit on you, the old me had died. Lumiere was the one I had shed those tears for. For all those years, I had been so wrong about him. I thought him to be weak and helpless, just as the others told me, but he was strong all along. It takes an incredible amount of strength to keep moving forward towards your dreams when the entire world, when fate itself seems to want you to quit. Lumiere was an amazing, courageous person. And it was that unrelenting spirit of his that allowed him to evolve into the current me. He had been a great hero all along. His own hero. Thanks for helping me realize that, Uncle Zero. Now, I will carry on Lumiere’s legacy and make the world a better place. I want you to have the honor of choosing the name by which the new me will be known!” “Eh? Wow dude, that’s hella deep …” Zero rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, “Well, if you insist…Let me think…I think something like “Eeznus” would suit you well! It sounds strong and aggressive, but gentle at the same time. Perfect for a hero who strikes down evil and protects the defenseless! What do you think?” “Eeznus…” the triple-sluggered Ultra uttered the name slowly, savoring the feeling of pronouncing every vowel and consonant, “Eeznus. The thought of being called that name…It fills me with such a strange giddy feeling…Such a good, wholesome name...It’s perfect!” “Awesome!” Zero flashed Eeznus a thumbs up It wasn’t the first time he had died and been reborn like this. And at this moment, he felt as though Eeznus was the reincarnation of the bright-eyed child who had yelled out his dreams over the voices of the crowd all those millennia ago, radiant and unstoppable. To be honest, he felt like pulling some pranks right now. The question is, what kind? Oh, he could even combine pranking and fighting crime! What a wonderful idea! Oh, and he could bake some cookies afterwards. “KAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKA!!!” the mountain echoes carried on Eeznus’ joyful laughter. At age 5001, the universe’s strongest underdog bared his fangs for the first time. That day, a legend was born. A legend that blazed a fiery path in everyone’s hearts, leaving behind a faint smell of cinnamon and dusty old books. ————————————————————————————————————————— “Reminiscing about the past again, huh? Ka ka ka…” Eeznus caught himself. Deep in his thoughts, he had completely forgotten that he was churning butter. Desperate to make up for lost time, he screamed and began to churn butter at supersonic speed. “Are you seriously injecting cookie dough into his bloodstream?” came a defeated sigh from one of Rauda’s spy orbs. “Don’t you think we’ve had enough death in the last few days?” “Oh worry not Rauda dearie, it’s my special brand of isotonic cookie dough!” Eeznus flashed the orb a thumbs up, “That way his body can be nourished while he sleeps!” The rising twin suns of Planet Dank cast gentle rays on the prone form of Leg. Wrapped in a hand-sewn fluffy blanket and attached to an IV full of Eeznus’ newest culinary abomination, he slept soundly with a faint smile on his face, his mind and body finishing up their recovery from the year of hellish training. Once he woke up, his new power would truly blossom. And Eeznus had already taken all the necessary measures. Leg stirred in his sleep, a vibrant blue aura zapping up around his body for a single moment before dissipating, and Eeznus smiled, returning to churning butter. Soon his student would wake. Soon the fun would really begin. Today marked the 20 000th anniversary of his official retirement from active duty. Retiring at the age of 55 000 to become a training instructor simply because of a single defeat…Perhaps some dumbasses would consider this a coward’s way out, and a failure. “Kakaka, idiots!” Eeznus thought as the Miclas milk finally separated into buttermilk and butter. It was just a different way of never giving up. ————————————————————————————————————————— Brebs was roused from recharge mode by a mysterious flying orb unceremoniously dropping a sack of cookies onto its saddle. Its defense reflexes kicking in from the rough awakening, it fired a cannonade of laser beams from all three of its mouths, reducing the orb to ashes. Moving to inspect the dropped bag, Brebs’ sensors conducted a careful analysis of the cookies’ components. Surprisingly, they weren’t poisonous or explosive or in any other way dangerous, but rather extremely nutritious, fortified with many vitamins and minerals and bursting with flavor. Weighing the options carefully, the motorcycle decided to nudge its sleeping rider awake with its middle muzzle, concerned that the cookies would begin to go stale if not consumed soon. Though at first grumpy from being awoken from his post-training nap, Brotein’s spirits were immediately lifted upon being offered the bag of cookies. “Fank fou Frebs!” he sputtered crumbs while violently shoveling the cookies into his mouth. “Wait, what the hell is this sh*t?” shoving his entire fist into his mouth with ease, Brotein unstuck a rolled up piece of paper from the back of his throat. “What kind of sick f*ck puts paper into cookies? Just wait until I get my hands on you, you sh*tty excuse for a chef, 'cause when I do, I'm gonna punch you so hard this sheet of paper will look like a f*ckin' encyclopedia in comparison to how flattened you'll get...And then...I'm gonna find the filthiest, greasiest f*ckin' kaiju that has ever roamed this universe. And I'm gonna take the sheet of paper that's all that remains of your pathetic existence AND USE YOU TO WIPE THAT KAIJU'S ENTIRE A...” He flinched back, letting out a yelp as the paper suddenly began to read itself in a screechy elderly voice. “Dear Brotein!” the paper said, “I hope you liked my trademark Eeznus-Style Fortune Cookies™! Considering your lifestyle, the recipe has been tailored specifically to fit all of your dietary needs! Take care of your body well, young one! Now, let’s get to the point, shall we? You want to earn the title of the strongest warrior in the world, don’t you? Color me interested! I’m coming out of retirement specifically for the purpose of testing your might in one on one combat! Meet me on Planet Lopata in two days’ time! Toodles! Ultraman Eeznus.” Brotein crumpled the paper in his fist and screamed. Next Episode Preview Brotein: EEZNUS YOU MOTHERF*CKER! WHY THE HELL AM I FIGHTING THAT LOSER INSTEAD OF YOU?! Eeznus: KAKAKAKAKAKAKA!!! Looks like somebody didn't read the small print on that paper! Brotein: What small print? Eeznus: The one that says "Before fighting me, you must prove yourself worthy by defeating my student!" Brotein: F*CKDAMN SH*TC*NTS!!!!! Eeznus: Woah there buddy. Leg: Yo, Brotein! My new power is nothing to sneeze at! Prepare yourself! THIS IS MY...HOT HOT LEG!!! A mysterious ball-shaped object: Svo svo svo svo svo svo...How wonderful! This tragic chess game enters its mittelspiel! Leg, Brotein and Eeznus: WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?! Eeznus: Next time, on Ultraman Leg...'' Burn On, Young Heroes! Full Throttle Into An Uncertain Future! ''Sparks fly on Planet Lopata as Leg and Brotein's fated rematch finally commences! Meanwhile, something nasty is lurking in the shadows! Leg: *scrawls "You wouldn't wanna miss it" on the screen in lightblood* Category:TheMoonShard Category:Ultraman Leg episodes Category:Ultraman Leg continuity